i would give spencer pratt a bj just so i could bite his dick off
he'd just find a way to get more famous from being a eunich.
I really love her but I don't think I can go the rest of my life without anal.
Promise me that if I become one of those sad people that facebook pesters you to 'reconnect with' you'll tell me so I can delete mine and save myself the humiliation?
glow-in-the-dark stars on his ceiling from '98 totally make blowing him more romantic.
The worst mistakes make the best memories. Write that down.
I feel like I need to get rid of the black eyeliner, glitter, and tequila breath before I to that world poverty conference..
so i may have indirectly taught my 13 year old campers how to give blowjobs.
Agreed. And i highly doubt it could be awkward. You do remember our introduction was a direct result of you mentioning your affinity for my genitals, right?
I ended up on the roof were calling it a tie
His rebound girl is half his size, looks like a leprechaun, is majoring in theater studies and has arms like Rosie O'donnell. Do I win?
Where would I incorporate "your boyfriend fucked the shit out of me last night" before or after Merry Christmas bitch?
Ed's in which sucks about a thousand cocks... But thats 1800 less than working with Alex so it's gonna be a good day
GET ME OUT OF HERE THE DOCTOR KNOWS HE IS JUDGING ME I DEMAND A PRISON BREAK
That isn't the worst part. It got a bazillion times more awkward when he read me a poem he wrote about his dead cat.
I love you. Doing a double. Going to die. It will be painful. Let the world know i partied. God, did i party.
Randomize
