There's a technique?! I just slide my tongue around
i had a dream the other night i was titty fucking you while you were asleep, then you woke up and didn't care.
if I could go back to kindergarten and not fuck up my life, I so would.
Dude, she's just using you for your money, and Cavs tickets.
Honestly, what else do I have going for me?
You make a valid point.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
can you call in chlamydia to work? like if the antibiotics they gave you for it are giving you the shits...
I vote intervention dinner around 6, make up movie around 7:30ish, then apology drinks all night. Then hangover waffle house in the morning.
Girl we've come a long way since our first Brazilian wax
the cops accepted 42 wallaby way Sydney. and the cops, and cab driver accepted the new address. please tell the win i am experiencing
You don't know how emotionally damaged I am from crashing into that park maintenance van. I'll never ride a bike because of it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
"There should be some kind of award for sleeping with your ex 9 times in 3 days."
I've never had sex with me but I assume there are worse ways to be woken up.
I was sitting here smiling wondering why i'm so fucking happy at work. cookie has kicked in
Dude I turned down free booze. I think I'm growing as a person.
Kyle passed out in the tub after breaking a glass and shouting, "WHAT ASSHOLE GAVE ME A GLASS?" His girlfriend gave it to him...
So I met one of her cousins last night. She recognized me as "the guy that's always in the liquor store", I may have a problem.
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