wat bout pragnant strippers??
I'm going to an arts college, I live next to the frat houses, and my room number is 420. god has plans for me and I couldn't be happier.
dude, she masturbates with a ken doll.
She rolled a blunt with one hand...and instantly I had a boner, I'm going to marry this girl.
this must be what syphilis tastes like
you started putting condoms on anything with a point, then you were yelling at the lamp for using your last condom...
Being thankful with your family is one thing. Being thankful with your friends while getting drunk and smoking bowls while eating leftovers, priceless.
No Robbie is the name of a kid or dog, not an adult man who's fucking you.
Seriously how many times do I have to sleep with him before he stops calling me dude
As long as I don't spend the half the week passed out/fucked up on Klonopin and no one dies, this will be the best week I've had all semester.
According to him, i kept saying "I'm belligerent as SHIT" and tried to run around the house in just my bra and underwear. Thats when they decided to carry me to the car and take me home.
I mean she did throw a tantrum because you wouldn't let her suck your dick
Did you actually just quote Ace Ventura during a sext!?
You know it
Dammit now I have to marry you
Little girl was fucking around on the train and completely ran her head into a pole. Totally burst out laughing as she cried. Her mom was not amused. I don't think I should be a Mom. EVER.
I really want to stop getting this drunk. I've got the Sunday scaries and it's only Saturday
Randomize
