Was just hit on by a guy with 2 kids and one was named Rocky. I need to get out of Buena Park.
batman tramp stamp. Dibs.
He told me he wanted to break up so he could get "closer to God."
Does God suck his dick?
Just snuck alcohol into the hospital for my mom.
But life is now good. Well, not good, good would be not wearing the penis hat with the extended family of the boy I just cheated on, but as good as it's going to get today
He referred to his penis as "a gentle giant" and said I had offended it
And then he said "if you were planning on bird feeding me that's not ok"
Note to self; if you can light it on fire, you probs shouldn't drink it
Life update - currently drunk off my ass in the yoga room of SFO at 5:30 in the morning.
He was eating my ass and came up for air, I almost choked laughing because he had a toilet paper cling on stuck in his mustache
Have you considered sword swallowing? Something about that bj tells me you could make a it a career.
I don't know what she looks like but I'm pretty sure she has a pussy.
Drunk me commented on almost all of her pictures. My favorite one is titled "be as the sea". My comment is "cold, rough, large and letting anyone come inside you. you accomplished." Guessing I'm not invited to the party anymore.
I'm eating year old chocolate from the trash can. It was in a ziploc bag but still, this is a new low. Help me.
Yea she is hot. But she also had no toothpaste in her entire apartment.
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