Im def. not watching the CMAs. If Kanyes not gonna be there whats the point?
its like whenever the snow comes all the hott girls drop out of school. where are they
There's two girls at the bar sniffing each others boobs.
I spent an hour trying to convert bar outfits to church outfits. Its hard.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You were so drunk you decided to go out of the car window instead of using the door, once you realized what you had just done you said fuck it and went back in through the window
I don't remember much of last night. But I woke up with very apologetic texts from him this morning so apparently I didn't get laid. Which is stupid.
Hungover. Have to fix everything I've broken. I'm gonna be very late.
i can't invite random hot hobos into my aunt's house.
My Midnight Kiss was a Big Mac.. Happy New Year
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No no this isn't that fun. I'm alone drinking wine and me and the dogs ran out of things to talk about around 9 am.
Wine and a Lunchable. That would be depressing if it wasn't the pepperoni and mozzarella one. Those are the shit!
I never realized the effects a broken spine would have on my sex life
Was it cause you feel bad for the ridiculousness my vagina goes through because same
He was walking around and kept offering the neighbors flamingo lawn ornaments shots of vodka.
I was pretty sure he wouldn't be into me after I fucked his brother, and then his best friend, and yet, here I am doing lines off his stomach
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