How come twittering sounds sexual?
Because of Bambi.
Considering the face that your still in jail Im gunna go with no.
I woke up on the side of the highway to the ppl in orange jumpsuits cleaning to comunity service. Not sure which freaked them out more... Finding a dead b ody or me not being dead
I actually had to roll up my long sleeves to masturbate. I hate the winter
He snuck into some random hotel's continental breakfast at 3 AM and then passed out on a bench in the lobby. When the cops found him they made him empty out his pockets. No phone, no ID just muffins.
She has an inverted nipple. She told to play with the normal one until the other one pops up.
This is why Helen Keller didn't drink
I heard moaning and ass slapping and sponge bob.
It's snowing in May and there was a law school party at the strip club. The end is near.
There is a man playing a trumpet at this brunch and I hate life. Too hungover for this. Send help ASAP.
I just want somewhere where I can sit down, without changing my clothes, that will serve me breakfast food and booze. Is that too much to ask?
Now in listening to Jerome Bettis speak at the hall of fame and my boner just started twirling a terrible towel
I'm sorry for breaking our door. And being a bitch about it.
did i just pee glitter
Why is this not the first time I’ve seen the mugshot of someone I’ve slept with
Randomize
