she didnt even puke last nite, shes finally hit champion status. i think im in love
yeah, but that could mean anything in Denmark.
i was so high i thought his mole came off and was flying around
guys are only as good as the porn they watch
I love that we get drink and call each other crying. It's kind of our thing.
Chick stood right next to me in the elevator. Like she had the whole elevator and she stood right next to me. So I farted.
Eating a muffin with a knife and fork. Hangovers have hit a new low.
I was so drunk. I apparently did a flip over the balcony using it as monkey bars. Ya I hurt a bit today
How can I not totally like a guy that told me my boobs were too big for me to be taught how to play golf?
I'm using my breathalyzer result sheet as a coaster for my 40.
Told some guy to hold your weave while you "tried" to kick his girlfriends ass...
I just sent a dick pic to a number on Craigslist, this may be my new low
I think part of my soul drowned in beer and/or jack daniels last night.
I'm classy like audry Hepburn. Chugging wine out of the bottle on the way to the club. Shed do that. I know she would.
I WANT GRASS AND TREES NOT SOMEONE SWINGING A SWORD AROUND
Randomize
