just thought you should know that she got home at about 6am.... totally wasted. she was locked out and when i finally came to the door she was on a patio across the street with some random making hotdogs on somebodys elses bbq.
I wish life was like dora the explorer where dancing pigs appear out of nowhere to solve your problems for you
Because its an amazing idea and you're the only one I can think of that will allow a pirate threesome
All I'm saying is that whoever owned the wheelchair clearly didn't need it or they wouldn't have been able to leave it there
Dude.. full face helmets and hangovers do not mix... I am never going to get rid of the smell of puke.
How do we stop her downward spiral?
Wine. For us.
I also know you puked in your shoe.
That would explain the note .... I apparently wrote myself an apology note from drunk to sober me .... saying "sorry for the fancy shoe soup" .... ugh I'll never drink again ...
this place is dumb. no one understands my Sunday morning alcoholism here.
Having weed delivered to your door is like having your own personal Santa Claus
He kept squeezing my butt and telling me how smart I was
I had sex while you were puking this morning and I'm sorry. Kind of.
It's ok. I had sex while you were drunk crying last night. We're even.
I shouldn't have that kind of responsibility when the prospect of being high is readily available. All I could do was hula hoop and smoke cigarettes last night. My remembrance of anything important was out the window.
I will never use my dick in anger. With great dick comes great responsibility
I know you're having some issues right now but can we focus on the gangbang?
Actually new year, new me. I haven’t had sex yet so technically I’ve been a virgin all year.
Randomize
