Goodnight my chunky, little, marshmallow muncher
Bts the comment you were making during that picture was "look we have penises"
yea ive hooked up with like half those guys
and i've hooked up with the other half...when our powers combine, we are captain slutbag
if pee wee herman would have taken a snuggie to the movies he wouldnt have gotten caught
its a long story involving jim bean, an owl, and a knife
At one point I was double fisting both beer & ice cream. I love public events in this town.
Knowing that he goes to voodoo every Thursday really makes me want to get myself checked.
But for future reference, it might help your game if you don't tell the girl you're trying to get on your dick that she's "not the worst thing you've ever seen"
I wonder when walk of shame thursdays in the rain will finally make me stop drinking.
Jesus these cramps...it's like every potential fetus I swallowed last night is personally punching me in the uterus
They were swingers. Real swingers. Thought it was going to be awesome until some fat guy tried to put my dick in his mouth.
I will be single by the day my lease is up (234 days). Plan accordingly.
The only word that describes how much hair I shaved off of my ass is "considerable".
meanwhile at my house I found 2 bud heavys in the back of my book shelf crammed between a Franklin book and goodnight moon
I want to buy weed from this guy on Tinder but I'm not sure I should trust him...but it's free delivery
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