member when we used to take shits together before volleyball games?
So then the officer asked you how you were getting home and you told him "very carefully"
sent the pic of my tit to the wrong bbm chatroom
You know its bad when you can over hear the planned parenthood nurses talking shit behind your back... they've seen everything
Fuckkkk i made out with a freshman.....but he's old for his age. THIS IS WHAT HAPPENS WHEN YOURE NOT AROUND.
And in my birthday dress, with my friends, i peed on myself in line for the club. Still went in and partied. I remember pieces
Ryab! Make hr wtop. Mshe make sme speee. I don want to pee. I want sev. He was so igbad. Redpo.
I plan on being naked for at least 2/3 of the wedding.
I want morning sex. We can incorporate maple syrup into it somehow, it'll be fun
I've spent hours masturbating before. It's actually my favorite Sunday activity
The moment when you go to plug in someone else's phone in your car and your lube is in the way. Don't mind that it's just my center console car lube. Normal.
Probably should start having regular sex again too to lose this breakup weight. Good cardio.
The people around me on the bus dont know im wearing glowsticks under my clothes. I feel like a super hero.
Dude. Craziest ride ever. I was convinced that the bus was an airplane. There were clouds when I looked out the window. I got really upset every time the bus turned because airplanes shouldn't turn.
Stop inviting Kevin over. The dickless wonder started playing some strange Sci-FY music and speaking an alien language and the girls split.
Randomize
