capris are just wrong
its like "what can i possible wear to make myself look short and fat? Oh I know!!"
Man now I have poo on my blackberry!!!
brownberry?
please hurry. your mom just evil laughed to herself in the kitchen like she's plotting my death.
I took it to a new level. I'm procrastinating taking my adderall. Hate finals week.
i fucked a milf yesterday.
i'm not impressed, in this generation that could technically mean a 16 year old.
you almost dropped the shot glass then you thought you were such a hard ass for catching it that you slammed it on the table and broke it
Attn: you have now used your free, one time admission to pleasure town. Thank you for visiting I hope you enjoyed your trip. All future trips to P.T. Will cost you full admission price. We have different pricing plans to accommodate different situations, and remember it is more of a bartering system than a set price. Your patronage is always welcomed and once again thank you for visiting and have a fantastic evening.
i just feel like the statute of limitations for admitting i plowed through her car last night was up a couple hours ago
Like "oh its Monday, gotta get wasted today!" not "oh its Monday.. Gotta go to class"
So are you actually going to come fuck me in the ass this weekend, or was that just you being drunk in a kilt?
plus there's no nice way to tell a guy you physically hate the shape of their cock.
Have you forgotten that this whole sexy cop role play started with a comment about my mom?
ITS THE CIIIIIIRCLE OF SLUUUUUUUTS
We put you in the box and you started to cry, that's how high you were.
100000% expect a picture of my ass in them
Randomize