and the mascot is a pinecone. its really no surprise that people here dont get laid
he said "you're pretty" then i made out with him. thats all it took
Is it socially acceptable to order two burrito bowls?
anything's socially acceptable if you do it with enough confidence
I just found pie in my hoodie pocket... This break needs to end.
I'm pretty sure we got the cab driver deported
we kept pushing you at the prospective students saying go for it, itll make them want to come here
you kept yelling THIS ONES FOR THE ADMISSIONS OFFICE and then youd go in for the kill
"The juvenile turned and faced the officer, unzipped his pants, placed a fresh cigarette in between his legs and preceded to light it with a match"
ill give you food and tequilla and penis and joy
In her drunkenness, she packed a bag with tequila, two shot glasses, salt, a knife, and two pears. She was prepared but too high to distinguish pears from limes.
did you see me getting spanked by that lady cop who was a guy?
Yeah no problem. What are blow job angels for anyways
FYI my mom is sending thanksgiving "samples" of her fancy pot stash for us this weekend. I bring the BEST family leftovers.
You can trust me. I'm unemployed and not wearing pants.
I deleted all traces of him from my phone
even the dick picks he sent you?
no are you nuts? saved that shit to my camera roll
STOP SENDING ME NAKED PICTURES WHEN I'M TRYING TO TEACH. MONDAY TUESDAY 1-3 IS A DICK AND ARSE FREE ZONE
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