let me know it goes. try not to get bit. and if you can, get someone to videotape it.
i bet even starving children in Africa take the crust off their poptarts
Just turned elections for the sorority into a drinking game. Right on.
do you ever facebook stalk someone so much you think their inside jokes are yours?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
woke up this morning with a fat chick but she went downstairs and made pancakes without saying a word.
I've got to stop making out with the guys and sharing drinks with you. I'm the reason we all get sick at the same time. Sorry.
you know it's gonna be a good 4/20 when you start saving up for it in january.
Someone please drive out to my house to bring me a beer.. There are some in the fridge but I just can't get up
If they weren't representing Obama and the White House, they definitely would've punched me in the face.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Unfortunately, the Bilbo Baggins adventure side of me that likes to go on adventures appears to be losing to the side of me that likes to smoke weed in the bathtub and watch Workaholics.
So never has there been a greater Valentine's Day gift than you actually putting a new roll of toilet paper on for me after using the old roll up! You didn't even use the new roll. You clearly put that on from a gentleman's standpoint vs. a selfish standpoint. I love you!!!!
I wouldn't be too worried. He's been known to chase a chubby before.
THAT IS NOT HOW YOU TALK TO YOUR SISTER
By the way, just opened the browser on my phone for the first time today... And it was it the "images" section of "who invented ass fucking"
So thanks for that
My loniness meter has reached its peak. I just played shadow puppets using my Big Mac on the wall with my cats
Basically, I am an endless fountain of unconvential sexual experiences and knowledge.
Randomize