I was just tapping my foot in the bathroom at Penn Station just PRAYING for anonymous sex. You know how that goes.
I just need someone to hold me and tell me i dont turn boys gay
Well, I fucked her. But the sex wasn't all that great. Morning sex never is
lets be honest. she's not NEARLY as much fun to fb creep since she got out of rehab...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He blew a load on his roommates pillow just to piss him off. Why did you introduce me to these people?
What an age we live in that I can try to pick up a guy by using my phone while I'm taking a shit at work.
i came home to her naked eating chilli on the living room floor. Stop giving her jager.
No one likes a giant penis on their phone screen. I mean cmon. I'm a lady.
Every time I someone I meet again from that wedding it turns into the "Oh your the guy who puked in the hallway and passed out in front of the elevator."
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's not so much that I'm giving her money because I threw up on her floor. It's more like I'm paying her to never ever mention it again.
At the very least, I mastered a nap while occasionally being dry humped.
Using the money underagers give me to buy this semesters books.. My mom would be so proud
She was just trying to do dick voodoo. Pretty standard stuff.
My friend Julia's mom just called her to say she got a puzzle in the mail made of cheese and when she put it together it spelled FUCK YOU and she doesn't know who it's from.
I seriously thought Satan had his hand up my asshole and was pulling out my soul. Never. Again.
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