how lazy do you have to be to be a fat vegetarian?
Its alot easier to hide alcohol when your wearing a toga..
everythings easier when your wearing a toga.
This freshman just ran out of her seat in a 200 person lecture, opened the emergency door and vommed everywhere. Then quietly went back to her seat. $2 Pitchers hit someone hard last night.
They really brought out their best strippers for vday weekend
She was our DD the least I could do is have sex with her. Even when drunk I'm still chivalrous.
yea. Don't mess. He will heal me. But my blowjobs will be historical.
they were having sex on the toilet apparently and everytime someone knocked they flushed. it was like an auditory scoreboard of sex duration.
Also yeah I would definitely have to say that one of my favorite things to do is to get high and pet cats.
We now only communicate via Xbox messages. Living together is so easy
So then we ended up at a bar full of navy SEALs and I got one of them to take his shirt off, then I felt him up
I feel like 31-year old me is 21-year old me's hero
Now all I have unanswered questions and a fucked up finger
So unmotivated today.
Who am I kidding. So unmotivated this decade.
He deserves a nobel prize for his dick-giving abilities. 10/10, would ride again.
He's watching Always Sunny and eating refried beans straight from the can.
First day of school is awesome. I get to meet my students and figure out which of their mothers I’ I’m going to bang
Randomize
