No, veal is cruel because they chain them down, I'm talking about free range human babys here.
You give one guy a hand job and suddenly everyone wants to get with you
and thats how i got kicked in the balls by micky mouse
Wine + wine + wine + wine + bud light = puke.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude, a dry wedding reception should nullify the vows, because really, without the booze, you might as well be 5 years old again and playing dress-up
I can't wait to find out the true size of his penis! Please maintain enough sobriety for an accurate report.
I think I just used lyrics from the Sister Sister theme song to let a guy down easy...
He just texted me asking if I remember pinching his eyelid shut with my eyelash curler.
Before you even think your day was worse than mine, I had to disinfect and and stitch another dude's penis after his prince Albert got ripped out by an angry chick.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My fuck buddy is great and all, but it gets weird when she gets in arguments with her BF in the driveway
I don't like how my gyno is telling me how to live my life.
Seriously where are the good guys?
The friend zone.
I want sex. When is an appropriate time post funeral to ask for something like that. Like when it gets dark out?
Why did I wake up covered in glitter next to a half eaten cheeseburger?
Look, if it comes down to it, I’m spraying whipped cream on your nuts
Randomize