I am at a 420 party and i just told a girl "hey, less not getting donuts, more getting donuts"(1-855): and did she get any doughnuts?
No. I am devastated
No awkward lesbian experiences without me
Yeah I guess I was Pocahontus. If she were a trifling drunk who hung out in her undies, with possible brain damage.
I just saw my grandmother naked. again. this needs to stop now.
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just came on the shower curtain. sorry housekeeping.
well most of my day revolves around power hour
oh my god, there is an imprint from the nuva ring in the christmas card my mom sent me. merry christmas.
I just made bacon chili cheese fries for dinner...someday my kids are going to realize I'm a stoner & this will all make sense
You don't forget tits like those, even if you are vegas drunk.
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A guy dressed like Jesus just gave me a mini keg. Prayers really do come true.
when the officer asked him if he had been drinking, he just goes, "yeah, you?" then falls onto the table.
I Can't even believe I threw all my pizza rolls at her, I mean not only did i ruin a good meal but now I dont have anymore
I woke up with my wool blanket soaking wet on the dorm room floor, and my sweatshirt hanging on the shower door down the hall. So basically my camp-out-in-the-bathroom idea didn't turn out as planned
Easy. Go to walmart, buy a bag of charcoal. everyone gets a present and it's cheap.
Wanna have a sleepover and take me to court in the morning?