Pussy?
how
Wat do u mean how?
"Ever since I killed her kid she be actin' shady." Actual quote overheard at Marine World just now. Oh God.
I either date the nice guys or the assholes. There isn't any in between.
You need to find a taint.
I just realized his fb pic was taken in a public bathroom.
Please please please buy brown eye liner on your way home in the morning... I'm missing an eyebrow
Ya. I wonder how much being a beard for a major league baseball player pays. This could be a lucrative arrangement...
Ordained minister or not I hereby renounce all moral responsibility for any and all related occurrences
I've somehow found myself in an emotionally abusive relationship with a married man who gives me drugs.
My life is quickly turning into a Lifetime movie.
So the guy I hooked up with during welcome week just tried to booty call me from across the lecture hall at 9am. I don't think he gets how this works...
It could happen. I haven't creeped the rest of the guest list yet.
Just creeped. Everyone is a passable 7. Orgy is a go!
yeah, never be friends with someone with shitty eyebrows.. they obviously already make poor life choices
So, I have realized that I am kryptonite for married men. I'm not sure how to feel about this sober, but drunk me accepts her destiny.
For whatever reason, whenever she's drunk off Crown, all she wants to do is jerk me off with her feet.
Swimming turned traumatic when grampas shorts slipped off..
I still blew him because I won't let allergies keep me from doing what I want. But I almost suffocated like 10 times.
Randomize
