is it bad if i hope guys are like edward cullen and can read my mind. i could be a whore in disguise.
so i asked him why he doesn't wanna see me anymore and he said he was questioning his sexuality. cool.
currently hungover, lying in bed and cutting cheese with my drivers license. ashamed? not even a little bit.
They went to the hospital to try backflips in the parking lot. Be ready for the call
He just found another high guy at wal-mart. There now friends. His friend is eating a cupcake
youre always welcome to strip dance on tables with me Mag. what are friends for.
My goal is to not catch on fire... But if i have to dance im going to dance regardless of the danger
Just got smoked out by my boss. Working in politics is great.
Just brought out that old CCM hockey helmet. The one covered in sharpie penises with "DRUNK BUCKET" written across the front. The number of tally marks / initials from tonight's drunk stunts alone is equal parts inspiring and alarming.
All I found in my purse this morning was 160 cigarettes and a fistful of confetti.
I just took a condom out of my purse and opened it in front of my entire family because I thought it was a wetnap. Way too hungover for family brunch.
He knocked me over backwards in my chair. I had a beer in each hand. Didn't spill a drop.
Did I penguin dive down a hill last night?
He just took off his shirt. I'll text you later.
I was so high last night that at one point I kept licking his neck saying he tasted like soap and truffles.
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