she must of just birthed a child cause her labia touched the floor
You going to have to be more specific than the night we blew an 8ball off the toilet..
Needing to keep one leg on the floor during sex so you dont spin should qualify for some kind of drunk award.
Just realized I left my heels in their microwave. Whoops.
I walked into my room to see them crying, watching hey arnold, and passing a franzia box back and forth...
As a general rule, drunkenness and gymnastics do not mix.
you were leaning up against the wall pulling your shirt up asking girls to dance on you. your courage to do that is both admirable and frightening.
Double vision is so hot when a big dick is in sight. Thank you Bud Light.
You gave me balls I gave you half a boob. Fair trade
hey dude, just got with the girl in H4. so mark H off the apartment list
haha we are half through our lease and already checked off 17 letters
I'm at the bar, forgot my pants. Everyone's over reacting
Yep. My memoirs will be called "A Slore Worth Mentioning"
Sorry for trying to baptize you last night
You knew the entire thing in Latin I was so impressed
Bootycalls can't go limp that's like against the law
Slept on the bathroom floor again. I hope when I turn 28 I’ll stop doing that
Randomize