Billy Mays died!
I know. And the US is beating brazil...what's wrong with the world?
so her cute freckles turned out to be blackheads
you should just get pregnant. that way you don't need to decide on a career.
shes trying to light up her bowl in front of the fan. everytime it blows it out she just gives it a dirty look.
True life I used my fake as a photo id for my final. My professor told me good luck and laughed. Hope the bouncers are in the St. Patrick's day spirit.
the choice between paying your electricity bill and getting herpes medicine is a tough one.
I've taken to hiding pictures of us around his room so that he'll forever feel guilty for dumping me on Valentine's Day... And to potentially cock block any hook ups.
Give us adventure or give us cock. Or cocktails.
I think I may have walked up to her while she was with her friends and asked for a "do over".
I need to be drunk within 15 minutes of getting home tonight.
Move ovrr Titanoc and all you others. Heres the real tale of woe. This ladys failed search for boozdy goodnezs.
What the hell happened to my hand?
Well, you got in a fight with a cabbie while jaywalking, but we got you to walk away. The problem was 80 blocks away, when you punched a parked taxi for "running you over".
Ok. As long as I can keep Kevin contained to the room I'll be ok. If not u might have a naked puking Kevin at ur door
I'm eating go-gurt and drinking beer alone in the dark. This is why you shouldn't marry young.
My party ended early and I have a mountain of shrimp and weed
Randomize
