Whiskey dick.
Yea dude! Love it. Hate it. Have it.
Everyday of my life.
Will you Wikipedia Vin Diesel? Is he gay? It's important...
Yeah, I have to wait a few months then take a sample in, I asked the doctor if the sample could be wiped off my wife's back...i told her he said face only.
Just shot my load on a stink bug. Thought you should know.
I shagged another guy with one ball last night. Are there really that many dudes with one nut in la or am I just a magnet for prostetic testes?
You did not just play the dead husband card again.
I don't care. I'm going to fuck John's friend and it's all your fault.
We were all definitely blackout with drunk goggles on, even though you and Amanda were the only ones dressed up as it.
I used his computer to order the pizza and the only thing he had in his search bar was 'text NASA'
I just bought $54 in Easter crap to try and blend in the pregnancy test... And FYI, it totally worked.
crossed #23 off the Slucket List!
YOU JUST MADE YOUR SLUCKET LIST THIS MORNING.
Is 28 too old to get fingered in Centennial Park? Asking for a friend.
Also, feel like I need to install a nanny cam to remind myself what I did the night before.
Spencer just told me I got home and was opening beers with my teeth and trying to make pot butter
Trust me, I’ve got a sixth sense about dicks that tells me if a guy knows how to fuck and it’s tingling. You need to prove me right!
I’m not going to bang him just to confirm your Dickth Sense
The Dickth Sense!!! I love it! It’ll be our first porno!
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