I'm such a slut...i kept having sex with him after he called me his ex gf's name. I just felt like i deserved something out of it too.
we've progressed from teabagging to lighting eachothers asses on fire. this cannot be a good path.
So, I just sold my textbook to have money for Plan B.
thank you for letting me use your house as a brothel.
wearing the bible to the ABC party, thought you'd appreciate that.
On the way home there was a guy passed out IN the road on Colfax with his pants around his ankles, completely bare assed. If he was dressed as a speed bump, he succeeded.
i need to stop meeting underage girls and letting them into the bar. i mean yea its a surefire way to get laid without having to tell them I'm 26 but i feel like as a bouncer I'm focusing on all the wrong things
I bought a vibrating wall dildo with my tax return. You?
well when I said that I would ride his face until he ran out of oxygen, that's when I knew I shouldn't be around beautiful people anymore.
I want to but I can't have a boner while doing a install and working with a customer
It's amazing the amount I can accomplish with a glass of wine in my hand.
Being responsible doesn't make memories.
It’s like a buffet of marriages! Every option is available to you!
I guess it's too forward to greet him with a blow job?
my favorite sex position is the one where no sex actually happens we just get really stoned and eat a lot and watch netflix in the dark
Randomize
