Texts From Last Night

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  (561): View more from Florida

  So I just did the walk of shame at dunkin... A lady told me me I was really dressed up and I told her I was going to a luncheon.

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  (561): So I just did the walk of shame at dunkin... A lady told me me I was really dressed up and I told her I was going to a luncheon. http://tfl.nu/ni4o
  Replies (10) Good night (3136) Bad night (436) Order T-Shirt
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  (410): View more from Maryland

  it was worse than that time i tried giving evan head 4 days post nose job.

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  (410): it was worse than that time i tried giving evan head 4 days post nose job. http://tfl.nu/iasx
  Replies (12) Good night (384) Bad night (2977) Order T-Shirt
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  (778): View more from British Columbia

  No. untill you have done a puke that contains nothing but semen and tequila, you do not 'feel my pain'

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  (778): No. untill you have done a puke that contains nothing but semen and tequila, you do not 'feel my pain' http://tfl.nu/2rma
  Replies (28) Good night (1567) Bad night (7557) Order T-Shirt
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  (610): View more from Pennsylvania

  Just made everyone at my party download the vuvuzela app for iPhone, the neighbors absolutely HATE us

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  (610): Just made everyone at my party download the vuvuzela app for iPhone, the neighbors absolutely HATE us http://tfl.nu/1uhw
  Replies (29) Good night (6053) Bad night (1049) Order T-Shirt
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  (+86): View more from China

  Going to bed. I have to wake up early and teach small children. And then have affairs with their fathers. I'm going to get deported.

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  (+86): Going to bed. I have to wake up early and teach small children. And then have affairs with their fathers. I'm going to get deported. http://tfl.nu/uoj6
  Replies (10) Good night (5574) Bad night (1196) Order T-Shirt
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  (314): View more from Missouri

  It is official. It's the year of doin married chicks. Similar to the year of virgins but without all the baggage.

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  (314): It is official. It's the year of doin married chicks. Similar to the year of virgins but without all the baggage. http://tfl.nu/ccnt
  Replies (13) Good night (2561) Bad night (1259) Order T-Shirt
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  (519): View more from Ontario

  i am way too old to be getting fingered at work

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  (519): i am way too old to be getting fingered at work http://tfl.nu/4t42
  Replies (37) Good night (5836) Bad night (1312) Order T-Shirt
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  (650): View more from California

  Took me 12 hours to be sober again. Shitshow mission accomplished

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  (650): Took me 12 hours to be sober again. Shitshow mission accomplished http://tfl.nu/z9y5
  Replies (2) Good night (1731) Bad night (605) Order T-Shirt
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  (502): View more from Kentucky

  New development. Drinking at work is so easy and awesome I might have to do it everyday.

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  (502): New development. Drinking at work is so easy and awesome I might have to do it everyday. http://tfl.nu/wghi
  Replies (6) Good night (1932) Bad night (710) Order T-Shirt
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  (630): View more from Illinois

  I'm going to need to borrow your helmet cam for my Wednesday night blackouts.

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  (630): I'm going to need to borrow your helmet cam for my Wednesday night blackouts. http://tfl.nu/1rjt
  Replies (2) Good night (1776) Bad night (477) Order T-Shirt
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  (709): View more from Newfndlnd, Labradr

  I'm on a mission. But just to make out with him so his relationship collapses and he is single when I come back in April.

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  (709): I'm on a mission. But just to make out with him so his relationship collapses and he is single when I come back in April. http://tfl.nu/hy0p
  Replies (5) Good night (1369) Bad night (837) Order T-Shirt
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  (978): View more from Massachusetts

  I'm doing somethin that's never been done before...the 10 am booty call come over

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  (978): I'm doing somethin that's never been done before...the 10 am booty call come over http://tfl.nu/83z5
  Replies (10) Good night (1552) Bad night (443) Order T-Shirt
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  (931): View more from Tennessee

  Playing nyquil pong with a cat again

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  (931): Playing nyquil pong with a cat again http://tfl.nu/9ic0
  Replies (2) Good night (462) Bad night (311) Order T-Shirt
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  (505): View more from New Mexico

  Ohh man. That was a snatch-waxer with a score to settle.

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  (505): Ohh man. That was a snatch-waxer with a score to settle. http://tfl.nu/hoqs
  Replies (3) Good night (249) Bad night (505) Order T-Shirt
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  (310): View more from California

  he puked in the sink and didnt turn off the water before he passed out on the bathroom floor. its been 2 hrs and we finally noticed that the whole fucking house is flooded. to hell with this birthday party

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  (310): he puked in the sink and didnt turn off the water before he passed out on the bathroom floor. its been 2 hrs and we finally noticed that the whole fucking house is flooded. to hell with this birthday party http://tfl.nu/v00e
  Replies (1) Good night (160) Bad night (740)

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