try this...when you orgasm scream his address including city state and zip...
if i found out she had a dick after i got head, does that still make me gay?
Me + Nice restaurant + Copious amounts of booze + obscene comments to couples = valentine's day plans
Its ok we found him,,, He is in the bathroom trying to write his life story on a roll of toilet paper.
Guy Accidentally Starts A Group Chat With All The Girls He’s Talking To And Gets Absolutely Roasted
We are lost and the only things we have are peanut brittle, cookies and vodka. I think we'll make it.
The dorm having an ice machine is their way of inviting us to make mixed drinks.
I'm missing a sock, a boot, and antlers. We need to get on that.
He walked away from the girl that just blew him to hook up with another girl, and when she got pissed he just turned around and screamed, "SHE IS LIKE 10X HOTTER THAN YOU!" Then she went on an angry dick sucking rampage. There were 4 victims.
Something tells me your "Titties for Tracy Morgan" fundraiser won't pan out.
The Internet Is Obsessed With This Stripper Who Dropped It Low Just To Eat A Slice Of Pizza
party tonight. bring as many traffic cones as you can find. we need to section off the blackout drunks way better this time
What has my life come to that I have to spank someone in morse code?
Is it weird that I only look up my ex on Twitter when I take a shit? May have conditioned myself to associate him with shit
i now understand why vodka
The angle I tried to shoot a load on her face was unfortunate. I accidentally came on the David Bowie tribute she had out. Oddly, that made it more erotic.
My mom just said "okay girls, the ONLY thing i ask is that you stay sober Saturday afternoon, until halfway through lunch. And you don't wear that crystal camo hat. This is a funeral, not a tailgate party"