Did yall have sex?
Well we both woke up naked and there was a condom wrapper on the floor, but I don't remember so does that count?
Def not... that's how I managed to keep my number under 10 for all of college- If you don't remember, it didn't happen
This girl added me on fb and has all these pics of her kissing her little brother saying i will love you forever. I'm creeped out.
maybe it's her son
thats not any better.
if you don't go to jail tommorow I'll buy you a 40. Motivation.
It was good I woke up with my mattress on top of me. I walked around naked the whole night as people wished my Happy Birthday.
you're being fucking weird and i don't like it. text me when you're not being the after picture on a poster for rehab
We sent off fireworks off in the taco bell drive through. They're taking it way too seriously.
Do not shit in our house. There is no TP. I am walking to get more, if I do not return, I have probably died of dysentery after my last wagon wheel got stuck in a gulch. Tell Martha and Lou Ann that I love them, and that I passed away doing the Lord's work.
I have a calendar reminder for world domination today, you wouldn't happen to know anything about that would you?
I dnt think she needs convincing on the threesome part, it's the threesome with your roommate situation that needs some work
I climbed through his window to find him already with another booty call. This wouldn't have happened if I could upgrade from my 7th grade scooter to a real car.
…If I were you I wouldn't use that as part of your argument to your dad for a car
So apparently having sex with your co-worker in the bathroom at the staff party can get you fired.
Yeah I know my dick is weird, but I've surprisingly had a lot of fun with it.
One of these days I would like to go out drinking and stick to plan of just getting drunk and not be sidetracked with other people's plans of doing drugs along the way. I didn't even want to not feel my teeth tonight but here we go just another Thursday night when you live I live
Remeber when we went camping and fucked those two guys? Yeah me either but I'm covered in poison oak so I'm guessing it's from that.
I just wanna go home jackoff, eat chicken fingers, drink beer, play halo and go to bed. I'm sick of this shitty school, the shitty kids and having to fucking teach them.
Randomize
