Dude there are two smokin hot chicks laying outside my apartment...I almost want to tell them theyre laying where I threw up last night
U should. Its a good ice breaker
Should I feel badly because I just bought a really hot pregnant girl a drink after I lit her cigarette?
And then he asked the cop "shall i shut off the lady gaga?" as he was being frisked.
Drinking in an igloo changes everything.
If I'm going to go gay, i'm not going to go for a tiny dick.
Almost peed between 2 cars...till I realized that it's daytime and I'm sober.
They made the rule if I caught the ball with my cleavage they would drink the entire beer pong table. I don't think they expected me to actually do it.
Im on my period and I feel like I'm going to die. The only thing that can make this tolerable is for you to eat me out in the shower. Please. I'll do anything.
Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face.
If that's all it takes to cure your hangovers then you need to drink more.
He fell on top of me at a party. I slept with him a week later. We've been fucking for 2 moths. Most successful relationship ever.
Last thing I remember is whiskey shots. My roommate tells me we were there 15min before I decided to run home naked. And we live across from a police station.
hell no. i was not wasting my two tears of virginity on him.
You told me you were trying to learn all the MLB ballparks while you waited for your porn to load.
JB just got pulled over and I am in the trunk...... this isnt good
Randomize
