at this rate if someone im actually interested in likes me back im going to die of surprise before i even get to make out with them
i dont want to stoop that low. but my dick does.
Pretty certain he passed out for a while going down on me. Absolutely certain he passed out during the blow job.
Great. I get laid, Leslie Nielsen dies. I can't have have sex anymore, the film community can't take another loss like this.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you grabbed the waitors dick and yelled '2nd base' and then he gave you his number. I hate your life.
It's a 2 hour train ride a 7 in the morning, of course we're bringing alcohol
I hooked up with some guy to get over my ex last night. I was terrified until we started doing naked pushups.
Well it's a moot point because I did have a sink & I peed in it.
I am going to dream of scrotums tonight, I just know it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My gut feeling that we had reached a new level of intimacy last night was confirmed early this morning when you sleep farted on penis.
Some how my underwear was hanging from the antlers of a antelope head on the wall of the hotel........
I feel like that xmas present negates everything we were taught as little girls. Putting out DOES pay. God bless us everyone
I'm worried about us. We are almost 30 and we still drink jaeger bombs till we black out. Wait, no I'm not. I'm excited about us.
I hate when pretentious people talk bad ab corn dogs
Straight boys are literally imbeciles. If Darwinism doesn’t get them female rage will.
Randomize