If I was Danny Tanner and my wife died and left me with three kids I would hire a nanny rather than bringing in the sexually promiscuos uncle with a fetish for leather and rebellion and my obviously mentally ill (possibly gay) best friend Joey, who has never had a girlfriend and consistently talks in cartoon voices... a nanny is just a better choice
I sent you an email today but due to work restrictions, I had to misspell choke sex
Would it be too much if i wore depends to new moon so i dont miss any of it?
she said she likes her vagina punished
being with you and your tiny dick is punishment enough
well he's currently spooning the coffee table
I dove into a random van at the bar as the door was closing and ended up at some house with people I've never met in my life dancing in a basement
Going to an AA meeting just so I can fuck him...That's dedication
Would fucking the college coach be against recruiting rules?
I hugged the bouncer as we left.
Just beer bonged tequila, broke into the hotel next door and got chased by security. It's spring break
Yeah. Moral of the story: Don't mace yourself. It sucks dick.
She fell off the bed and giggled until she passed out naked. It was really weird.
Probably not gonna date her.
He has started theming his dick pics. I have one he sent his duck has a sombrero on. Another a Barbie is riding it.
So I told him "To answer your question yes I am naked making pizza pops in your kitchen"
She told me "I think I'm going to puke tonight" a few seconds later she said smiling"I can't wait!"
Randomize
