my FASA form asked what i spent the majority of my 08 earnings on, im tempted to put "booze, blow, & blunts"
i got excepted to unl lol
You mean "accepted".
the campus cop used the word depravity in our citation.
Was it a good night or a bad night when you have to apologize to someone the next day for trying to fuck them with a turtle?
Guy Accidentally Starts A Group Chat With All The Girls He’s Talking To And Gets Absolutely Roasted
she asked how her costume looked and all i could say was bars are dark right?
She's just so happy...and so naked.
if I open my eyes, my head will explode. that hungover.
I just need a text that says "put that food down bitch" and then maybe I'll lose water weight through tears
Buy Actually if the police need to find my body I'm on an air mattress in an apartment near a McDonald's that's all I see out dat Window
The Internet Is Obsessed With This Stripper Who Dropped It Low Just To Eat A Slice Of Pizza
i had a tequila and emotion induced one night stand with a random stranger. senior year: infinity me: 0.
I want to go out and have good clean fun.
Ok, but that does not include Bud Light Platinum and your vagina.
I've got a 90 day supply of amoxicillin in case of zombie or chlamydia outbreak
I know you saw me get knocked out after I stepped on that rake why did you leave me there
im mad at you for telling me he ejaculated during "let it go." Thanks for ruining the song forever.
I should stop pointing to my vagina when I say "I'm in charge!"