You don't have to be emotionally available for a blow job.
Nicole wore just a belt and her pedometer and hopped on top of me last night. She "walked" 822 steps before we finished.
New charity walk idea!
just got a girls number while on a 5 am adderall cig break this is college at its finest
Just because you were able to pour the entire bottle of wine into 2 glasses does not mean you took it easy last night.
These Attractive Criminals Got Modeling Contracts After Getting Arrested
He spent the entire date challenging me to chugging contests.
It's never too late to be topless.
The good news is I managed to avoid the three cop car looking for me. The bad news is I no longer have shoes.
I've decided I'm peeing in a solo cup then throwing it on his windshield. It's official. He called the cops 4 times in our first week at the house. He deserves it, right?
I just wanted to share with you that my life has come to naked arts and crafts, to fix my flask, with a rum and coke in my hand... Good luck on your exam
This Girl’s Unbelievable Catfish Story Will Make You Rethink Online Dating
I gave the naked guy in the hotel a pop tart. He stopped crying.
I don't know who's more excited for you to come home. Me or my vagina
I have banged to "The Emperor's New Groove" way more than could possibly be reasonable.
I asked him to help me break in the space ship aka my bed.
The stripper was super into me until she pulled out my tits then I realized.... This bitch is just using my ass to get MORE TIPS
Hey the moment you step into my house, find me IMMEDIATELY so we can pinky promise on not roping anyone at the party into yet another threesome