Texts From Last Night

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  (503): View more from Oregon

  Buhtt sex?

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  (503): Buhtt sex? http://tfl.nu/zx30
  Replies (9) Good night (2575) Bad night (1224)
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  (601): View more from Mississippi

  She kept saying "I didn't do it" but she was so drunk she forgot her pee was orange from her UTI medicine.

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  (601): She kept saying "I didn't do it" but she was so drunk she forgot her pee was orange from her UTI medicine. http://tfl.nu/p4hk
  Replies (21) Good night (604) Bad night (3548)
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  (239): View more from Florida

  yeah but it's new years. they should arrest people for being sober that day.

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  (239): yeah but it's new years. they should arrest people for being sober that day. http://tfl.nu/xjz6
  Replies (13) Good night (4813) Bad night (633)
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  (405): View more from Oklahoma

  You guys tried to boil water to fill up the empty hot tub. After the fourth trip back with the kettle you gave up.

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  (405): You guys tried to boil water to fill up the empty hot tub. After the fourth trip back with the kettle you gave up. http://tfl.nu/06n7
  Replies (8) Good night (3611) Bad night (1093)
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  (954): View more from Florida

  8$ liquor pitchers. I'm gonna wear two or three pairs of underwear so when drunk me takes them off there'll still be a pair on.

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  (954): 8$ liquor pitchers. I'm gonna wear two or three pairs of underwear so when drunk me takes them off there'll still be a pair on. http://tfl.nu/8x7p
  Replies (6) Good night (5490) Bad night (966)
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  (970): View more from Colorado

  Nothing like a Mormon bachlorette party to make you feel slutty

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  (970): Nothing like a Mormon bachlorette party to make you feel slutty http://tfl.nu/gq3b
  Replies (9) Good night (4129) Bad night (1020)
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  (303): View more from Colorado

  The dentist told me I have super glue on my teeth. I'm not blaming you I just want to know how that happened

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  (303): The dentist told me I have super glue on my teeth. I'm not blaming you I just want to know how that happened http://tfl.nu/m273
  Replies (3) Good night (3730) Bad night (1266)
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  (920): View more from Wisconsin

  He fell off the roof... he clearly has not been preparing for summer.

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  (920): He fell off the roof... he clearly has not been preparing for summer. http://tfl.nu/1gb8
  Replies (1) Good night (1708) Bad night (855)
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  (707): View more from California

  i just remember explaining why my socks were better than everyone elses.

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  (707): i just remember explaining why my socks were better than everyone elses. http://tfl.nu/z8lp
  Replies (2) Good night (1933) Bad night (588)
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  (920): View more from Wisconsin

  Some old truck driver just made me smell his beard I hope tonight turns out better

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  (920): Some old truck driver just made me smell his beard I hope tonight turns out better http://tfl.nu/nui9
  Replies (5) Good night (586) Bad night (1619)
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  (805): View more from California

  Setting up an obstacle course with ladders, hurdles, and a spring board to the pool. you down for drunk races through it later?

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  (805): Setting up an obstacle course with ladders, hurdles, and a spring board to the pool. you down for drunk races through it later? http://tfl.nu/nvl3
  Replies (7) Good night (1375) Bad night (460)
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  (732): View more from New Jersey

  soon, soon....

  (908): View more from New Jersey

  I don't believe you anymore. You're like the boy who cried coitus.....

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  (732): soon, soon.... (908): I don't believe you anymore. You're like the boy who cried coitus..... http://tfl.nu/hpc3
  Replies (4) Good night (938) Bad night (605)
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  (359): View more from

  A blind man just put his face in my cleavage. I'm also crying.

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  (359): A blind man just put his face in my cleavage. I'm also crying. http://tfl.nu/5q6d
  Replies (3) Good night (438) Bad night (624)
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  (248): View more from Michigan

  I just realized that in 3 weeks it becomes sad if I make everything into a drinking game. Fuck growing up

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  (248): I just realized that in 3 weeks it becomes sad if I make everything into a drinking game. Fuck growing up http://tfl.nu/z2m0
  Replies (2) Good night (608) Bad night (382)
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  (330): View more from Ohio

  I did my patriotic duty. I woke up next to a veteran this morning.

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  (330): I did my patriotic duty. I woke up next to a veteran this morning. http://tfl.nu/se9h
  Replies (6) Good night (780) Bad night (227)

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