She told me she got a 15 on her A.C.T.. that's when I knew it was a done deal.
remember them days when you seriously wanted your mom to marry rev run and we would always talk shit about justine?
joeyyyy why you always taken cheeseburgers from me?!?!?!
i just met a girl who was sent to the hospital for using her phone as a vibrator and got electrocuted. 4 weeks later she got sent back for shoving a hot dog up there. welcome to the teenage american society
I wish I loved anything like you love Tequila.
$3 wine plus diet sprite does not make good champagne.
does taste better than andre tho
Real housewives of new joisy starts MONDAY. Skype session after? Virtual slap the bag?
Just gave my manager part of my viccodin stash-my job is basically secured forever.
five cans of playdoh and a game of guess whose penis ...
Stop leaving me alone with my ex boyfriends after keg challenges. Woke up in his bed covered in what you think would be cum. No...toothpaste. He left a note. "Be home at four. Don't be here when I get back."
Hey, don't think you remember me but we met last night. I'm conducting a survey this morning its only one question: Have you seen Rob since 1am?
Hey where the fuck is the rest of my beer? Lets start this day off right
Ladies and gentlemen, the only person I know who would keg stand in pearls and a bow.
it's like i'm making a family tree of tunnel buddies for my vagina
Let's just say his oral game was lacking. Hell, lacking is too nice of a word to describe it.
When I go to hand him the blunt and he's eating a cookie and responds with "let me hit this cookie"