The worst thing about having a parent with a prius is that they can walk in on you without any warning
i woke up to see him pissing on your n64. thats like killing a unicorn. punishable by death for sure.
I'm not really sure how I got home, but judging by this headache, i'm assuming it involved bourbon.
i may or may not have puked on your loofa in the shower.
A. What the fuck are period panties? B. Don't ever wear them around me... or bears.
I've reached the slutty point of no return. And it feels like multiple orgasms and coke lines
I may be a little fuzzy on this, but I think at some point I said something about being a generous lover.
Dude she's on meds. He has a ginormous penis. Ur A dumbass. That concludes our feelings chat. Dim Sumday?
For a limited time only, free special muffin with the referral of a loyal dro customer! Have it for breakfast and be happy off your ass all day! Guaranteed! New member must buy at least an eighth. Oh and O's are on sale for 280.
You. Win. At. Life.
Well you wanna do it now or later? I've had three shots and I'm listening to journey by myself. Emotionally there is no better prime time than right now.
They're showing aladdin at the bar my birthday is complete
Relationships are fuckin' work. And you can't just up and leave with no questions when you really just need to get home because you're about to shit your pants.
You're so wise.
You drunkenly hook up with 5 people in one night and suddenly everyone tries to party with you.
Can you stop being a bitch and just take some Kaluha shots with me bro?!?
well at least now you can say you got an STD from the frontman of a band no one's heard of
fuck you.
Randomize
