my mom is pro-life. I dare you to fuck me.
And surprisingly enough iPhone does not have an app for Russian mail order brides.
Hey, don't feel sorry for me, the two girls in front of me just ordered 18 dollars worth of taco bell. Life could be worse.
Why is the word 'best' written on my chest?!!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You were yelling in my ear let's double team her with her right next to us
chugging beers on the train. people are staring. I would be offended if it wasn't 8:30
I'm thinking about wearing a strap-on just to freak him out the next time he pulls my pants off.
I don't think you understand. Its the best fauxhawk you've ever seen. I look like a gay dinosaur.
That's the most beautiful thing I've ever heard. Can I call you littlefoot?
I have to be at work in a hour. Can you sufficiently fuck me in 35 minutes?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Def something wrong w taking plan b with your daughters juice box
BoomCity!!!
You don't have to text me that every time you have sex. I already heard you ring the gong.
I just came so hard my vision went blurry. I can only hope one day I'll find a man that can accomplish what my left hand does on a tri-daily basis.
My new roommate is awesome. His father owns a bar and his sister has an E cup. I'm going to be with him forever
dad is drunk and texting us pictures of bread
I'm going to use this quarantine time to improve my blowjob skills.
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