you drank 3/4s of your half gallon of vodka, made a fort out of the kitchen table, and actaually had sex in in it.
We turned everything surrounding BP and the oil leak into a "that's what she said" drinking game. We've been drunk for a month
Seriously he's so hot. And it's so hard to flirt with a deaf guy
Although, I did get to see a Raiders fan and his toothless girlfriend get roughed up by the police and dragged out of the stadium. So the night wasn't a total loss.
Ok I'm good with that cause I'm gonna disappear for 90 days
Are you goin to rehab again?
it went ok. then he slept in a parking lot and took me out for a picnic the next day. boys are confusing.
Either I'm still drunk or the right side of the bed is now the left side.
If you want it you better put a ring on it. And by ring I mean one of my three favorite pies.
Why do I have a vague memory of your entire fraternity climbing in through my bedroom window?
we watched a porno and made a drinking game out of it. best first date ever.
Hey, taking organic chemistry means no one is allowed to tell you you're partying too hard.
They forgot my ranch. They're dead to me.
Currently tripping balls and watching Pink Floyd the wall and I'm crying during it. If this isn't a self realization then I don't know what to tell you.
my drug dealer is also my eyebrow lady. Two birds, one stone.
he walked off and puked in the sand. then he made a sand castle over it so that "it wouldn't upset the kids"
Randomize
