What's proper 1 nite stand etiquette?
Say hi to his dad and make him some breakfast.
How can she be afraid to give you a blowjob? It's not like your penis is going to turn on her and eat her.
you should break up with her....give her the gift of reality
My meds have diminished my sex drive, this must be what regular women feel like
Just 30 Funny Tumblr Posts About Starbucks
Who knows? Maybe we can sing afternoon delight into each other's genitals.
Old woman told me I looked like her son and then she started explaining to me how she wanted me to fuck her
In the 2nd smartest move of my day your ringtone for when you call is now the Space Jam theme.
I love how my phone automatically capitalizes Margarita. R-e-s-p-e-c-t.
Hahahaha don't tempt me. Remember we're trying to avoid airport jail if possible
18 People Are Kind Of A**holes But Also Completely Hilarious
He went to cum on my stomach and somehow it got behind my ear. He's like a fucking jizz Houdini.
On another note- any interest in going to a gay bar to hit on 19yr olds?
Plus my dignity needs a night alone with me.... Oh that's right. I lost it last night
I didn't know that all of his brothers would be hot and musical too. That's a dick move on behalf of biology.
lying in bed pretending to be a slug
There is a couple fucking in the outback bathroom and at first I thought it was sick but than I remembered my Outback fantasy with you and decided I can't pass judgements.