Dude, TWO hot chicks on jeopardy tonight. gonna be a good one
Dude, I am so turned on right now. Hot chick with glasses from brooklyn is absolutely crushing right now, taking whole categories. might beat off to jeapordy...
do another line during during the commercial and make the magic happen during double jeopardy.
I wonder if those guys know that i know that is a halfway house and dont just think it is some cool older guy frat house.
apparently I kept yelling at her that I wanted t-Rex sized lines. awesome
she said she's never had and orgasm AND she's a cubs fan...ouch.
Hey welcome to Rick's drunk text tree. Rick is drunk right now please respond with "shut up" to remove your name from this list. Thanks for playing.
was it you or me who tried to make the, what appears to be, nacho cake in the oven?
Just took my birth control pill next to the cubicle where we had sex last semester.
guy just got out of the car at the drive in and told his girlfriend "fuck you and your taco" and walked off
You're fucking beautiful as shit and we should have loving sex...
2 men making out for 2 seconds to trick a cop so they don't get arrested for being pulled over rolling a blunt is not gay.
If I send you a picture of a dick will you give me your honest reaction?
I sexted him with a GIF from titanic and it worked....
How’s your Christmas Eve so far?
I just chased my melatonin with red wine. It’s 12:00pm.
I picked up a towel, and butt beads fell out of it.
Oh yeah... Surprise!
Last night I had a dream that a man with an ice cream body entered a bicycle throwing contest and won.
Randomize
