My little brother has some high school girls in my pool, it's like a jailbait buffet in my backyard
you kept lifting my skirt up, yelling "PANTY PARTY". needless to say, you're at the top of my father's shit list right now.
i dont care how hungover you are, go back to the frat house and get him. HE IS 11.
She answered the door wearing a blanket and holding a golf club. I was too late for this party.
Left my card at the bar and had a drunk girl climb on the hood of my running car to scream at me.
And the best part is I don't remember putting the condom in my pocket! Angels officially exist
she's traveling up the coast with her camera and a stash of pot cookies eating food from different campuses. said she slept in a closet 2 states away last nite... of course I'm interested
Should I tell them about my ticket for possession or about how I'm shitting blood? Which one will gain the most sympathy?
youre always welcome to strip dance on tables with me Mag. what are friends for.
so far I've only met her once and hung out one other time. Up to 5 BJs already. That's serious efficiency.
Discovery: there is a folder in my pictures labeled "Your Name and cats"
Will you remind me I changed my hotspot phone password to fuckyouprivilegedwhitedude
Cookies and nudity, all you need in life
I just realized I have a habit of pre gaming for therapy visits. Problem?
We'll discuss it when you get here
You need to get a passport so we can carry our bad decisions over the border
Randomize
