NEED BACKUP we are in the kitchen arguing about who would win in fight against lil Wayne and snoop dog
I wish there was a "friends who have gained the most weight since high school" filter on facebook for when I am feeling fat.
The wedding was scheduled to start 5 min. ago. 20 people here so far, groomsmen in tees and jeans, catering by Costo. NO ONE OUR AGE IS READY FOR MARRIAGE!
you are my new fav person for making him do the walk of shame in pink footie pajamas!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Look I'm sorry I shaved your cat, but get over it.
wanna play who's drunker? I just made macaroni & cheese taco and offered it to the pizza Guy as a tip.
I just reached for my seatbelt when I sat down to pee... Might be a little hungover.
I definitely paid for a case and a fifth and all I got was 6 beers and a crown and coke. Wtf. Bar math sucks
Even though he was watching you pee on his bedroom floor, you kept denying it and saying he was dreaming
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The silhouette of his dick looked like an eagle. Amurrican.
I may have played more drinking games with my family this last week than all of freshman year...
Wait. You NEVER used a Dizzy Doodler pen as a vibrator?!?
They're fighting and it sounds intense. Cross your fingers for their demise
Toss in some raw meat and play heavy metal music. It will insight violence.
I'm too old for chlamydia. That's for 20 year olds who go to clubs and do drugs I've never heard of.
you had me at "meet me in the bathroom"
Randomize