Aj just asked if we were going to the bulldog tonight..i told her no because of the expense and tests coming up..but mostly because i don't want herpes
Are you kidding me. My sex life has diminshed to having wet dreams about jerking off.
just got a rotting pancake and bacon in the mail from your address....
It smells like ranch
Must be all the white people
That's your penis' name. I've always referred to it as Alejandro secretly.
Hahaahaah I keep finding little notes you left me on my physics notes... "TOO HIGH FOR BIRDS"
I blew him and did charles barkley impressions at the same time. what a pro
You gave your boss a bj to get the safe employee of the month award?
Yeah that's a good idea.. I like to be responsible when I trip my nuts off
I still don't understand if he's using me to write his resume or if we're dating
Currently on my Sunday walk of shame. Should I go to church?
It was the needle in the haystack of teary, unpleasant handjobs.
I feel like the dump I just dropped is the most successful thing I've done so far today.
You better not fucking die before we have sex while you blow fire. I'm serious. Don't mess up my sexual bucket list.
Yeah. We had phone sex then cried together, it was beautiful and heartbreaking
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