I hate babysitting girls whose boobs are bigger than mine.
I learned the names of so many hookups when they read them at graduation
this isnt the first time ive seen her dressed as abe lincoln
Hmmm just stalked him and according to his facebook he wants "whatever he can get." obviously he'd be open to the idea.
Go big or go home. i snuck in two beers in my bra. im here to win.
Shit. I'm running the whole hotel right now. The front desk girl had to run home because she left her vibrator on the counter and her brother, mom, and grandmother surprised her and are showing up to her place before she gets off work. This will end badly no matter what.
He's laying next to me passed out dressed as a hooters girl
I bet he's a super pretty hooters girl
BTW rolling him off the couch and onto that tarp was pure genius. He definitely pissed himself last night.
It hurts to hear and I can smell shapes.
Let me know. Show me one boob if yes. 2 if no
I don't think I'm gonna survive today. I don't remember how to walk. I must crawl 6 blocks to my bed.
He flipped me around so that we could have sex and both watch Die Hard... I think I found my sole mate. Merry Christmas to me!!🎄
I'm like a camel in the desert in a black hole I'm so thirsty.
That’s the third time this month he’s hooked up with a girl by telling her it’s his bachelor party, and he’s not even dating a chick let alone engaged.
It’s so white trash that I almost have to have it.
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