Either he has two lazy eyes or he really likes my tits..
Angelique from Rock of Love is now doing phone sex commercials for central illinois....id say she's going places.
i made sure i dropped the whole "im a yoga teacher" bomb which basically roofies a guys sense of judgement and guarantees he will sleep with me.
We should tie ourselves together anytime there is any type of alcohol involved. It's the safest way. I either end up with freshmen or weird ex bfs. You end up with a large cowboy. This is not good for us
You took it upon yourself to rid the world of them, and by that I mean you dressed up as Batman and started kicking them in the shins.
Just to an Octoberfest and a sex party. Nothing wild.
that pic of me and the hulking football player sure does come in handy when creepy guys hit on me at the bar.
I'm having a martini with dinner. A new level of class.
I'm stoned and eating mustard, also a new level of class.
I think I blacked out after I decided drinking alone on the trailered jetskis was a good idea
The shrooms have turned on carrie. Change of plans. We're getting stoned and finding bacon.
Whatever. I just want to indulge in this mcchicken and forget all about his tiny penis.
6 more days and it'll be a year since i slept with him and never went home
I will be the DD but everyone has to call me Mistress
i look like i'm walk-of-shaming but i'm really showered and re-clothed and rallying. i fool everyone
This is what I get for listening to Christians.
Randomize
