I like it. Barfy the gin-flavoured Assman
I miss him.. What the hell did I get myself in to? I guess it will get better with time.
No. Just liquor. Time's no good.
No, we're smoking outside. We're hot boxing the world.
I never once brought up his unibrow when he was insulting me. That's class.
I want a grilled cheese and an IV
Woke up this morning on my doorstep in a basket with a branch, a lipstick lightning bolt on my head and a sign that said "the boy who lived." i love you guys.
You need to let him know my only agenda is coke and sadness.
Indeed. Apparently I called my sisters and told them I wouldn't get arrested because it's not a real sword.
I've come to the conclusion that Jesus and 2013 are haters.
Can we just talk about how awesome I am. I just slept with a new guy while listening to the previous guys bands cd.
And all you did was hit on me and do things "for America", so you weren't judged heavily
I actually want to work out for some reason... I think it's my brains way of telling me it doesn't like living in a fat body.
Yeah, but he has adorable dimples and dimples talk me into things.
I deflowered you on valentines day. I AM THE BEST AT ROMANCE. LOVE ME.
You've been dating this guy for a month now and as your best friend I have to complain that I still don't how big his dick is.
Randomize
