Roman Polanski is more welcome at my daughter's birthday party than you are at that bar
it was frightening. in my opinion the only thing that should resemble a vagina is a vagina.
I told him I'd rather have sex with his father last night. I'll admit now that I was drunk.
Girl passed out in class and vomited. Another victim of syllabus week
Whiskey + Water + Crystal Lite does NOT = refreshing summer time drink.....
They broke our car window and then wrote "great night" on the next
Kid got laid mid-party wearin a fuzzy hat with ears and 40's taped to his bear paws... wtf
did i really sing to your nipples last night?
yes. and it was oddly very seductive
rigging a system to keep my jello shots cold in class. important election day work.
I think I just gave my niece a weed pinata...
High me is so sweet. She left not-high me a fortune from a fortune cookie and 6 packets of soy sauce in my tampon drawer.
we had to follow your trail of clothes to find you.......
i fucked his best friend. once right next door to him. i'm pretty sure that could be called sweet revenge.
I could have sworn that I went home last night... but judging from the couch I just woke up on, apparently not.
I am confused/concerned about the circumstances that led to your consumption of 3 beta fish last night.
Randomize
