he looked upset that i wasn't completely shaven. i reminded him he had begged. and beggars can't be choosers.
you drank a bottle of vodka and then while throwing up in my toilet you kept reminding me our hs reunion was in 2 yrs and it was time to start getting thin again anyway
We decided to smoke and then made crosses on our foreheads for ash wednesday
mom would be proud
On my arm I have 12 dashes, and below is written "plus 2 pretty stout whiskey drinks, so, you be the judge"
just had a flashback of you pouring champagne into my mouth from someones balcony..
Ask her if said friend is decent looking or a wildabeast. Need to know if I need to top these 8 coronas off with a little tequila.
I saw he had me in his phone as "the fat twin"
Someone just got pizza delivered to the liquor store.
i told him I'd let him eat part of a weed cookie out of my cleavage, so he pulled over like a gentleman.
Hey where the fuck is the rest of my beer? Lets start this day off right
Yo, I totally had forgotten you were CA. Thank you for making my life easier with modern medicine.
I met a gypsy today. She told me my soul animal was an owl and says she will now remember me as "Owl Girl".
With a butt like mine I'll never have to pay for Netflix again.
Found sauce from last night's pizza rolls wedged under my phone case... While sitting in my 8 am class. What happened last night?
Just got home from work. I'm going to change into sweats for a while before I have to wear normal pants to the party like I promised.