Remember that time I came into your room after taking a muscle relaxant and we argued about what state has the longest coastline?
I hraet yuo
did you say you heart me or hate me?
who is this?
You guys coming?
We are smoking out the bouncer? But after that sure
Well his aunt was in the next room so we had to be quiet. I felt like i was on an episode of silent library.
There are sesame seeds in my vagina. This cannot be explained with logic.
Note to self: do not take so many shots that you sit on the floor under the bar where nobody can see you, and reach out and grab peoples crotch.
I never appreciated sexting until I went to rehab
All I know is....there's beer in my camera. How do I know? Because I can pick up my camera,shake it and HEAR, the beer in it
I woke up with a black eye, bruised knuckles, wearing women's clothing, in a house I did not recognize, next to a solid 9. Thank you for making 21 special.
youre always welcome to strip dance on tables with me Mag. what are friends for.
Just found a pack of birth control on the corner of Oakland and Thomas, so if your desperate its up for grabs.
Well I either feel like the fat girl or very accomplished because his bed is now broken in three places
You can't break up with me. I brought you to see Beyoncé.
Masterbating to Tolstoy. You?
What happened lastnight it looks like I had sex with edward scissor hands....my back is so messed up
my bad i broke a mirror over your back
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