fucking a dude
i mean: fucking a, dude
wow, that comma made all the difference there
The brown eye won't let me do that either.
I had to fart so bad so i let it go hoping it would be quiet, it was loud and shit came out!!! and i couldnt leave because her parents were behind me
the jolly green giant just puched the pope. halloween is the best.
Just shot my load on a stink bug. Thought you should know.
It'll be like the burning bush except without moses and with pubes.
There's somethin not right about having to take the batteries out of your 27 year old boyfriends gameboy to use in your vibrator
guy in front of me at the pharmacy just asked the pharmacist for 2 Plan B's and replied with, "If your wondering, then yes I did have a threesome. It was amazing".
Walked back to my room from the bus last night and all I see is 3 of my friends on the porch chugging whiskey and then throwing up in unison
We won't have time to talk.. I'll be rolling you a blunt and you'll be getting naked.
So Doritos and vodka was obviously not as good an idea as I thought at the time.
The joke is on me because whale penis is forever in my search history.
Worth it.
My mum just told me to stop being so pathetic and just find someone to have sex with, even if I don't like them, just be grateful for the sex. Wow.
Who put the toilet in the living room? This is extremely inconvenient right now.
Profesor just winked at me. This class might be easier than I thought
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