I didn't join FB to see my only child straddle that boy in all her pictures.
The class that normally occupies the room we use for my Monday class had to do posters as if for a Hamlet movie and they pick actors for each character and this person wrote "Robert D. Niro"
Nobody knew what to do when it was dead. You said fire up the George Foreman, I've never ate baby shark. She hasn't stopped crying.
I gave him head while he watched NASCAR. My future flashed before my eyes.
His IQ is so high, I swear I started ovulating when he told me the number.
Shit. I'm running the whole hotel right now. The front desk girl had to run home because she left her vibrator on the counter and her brother, mom, and grandmother surprised her and are showing up to her place before she gets off work. This will end badly no matter what.
That hot guy i showed you guessed my exact bra size. I want to have his tan babies.
I draw, I play three woodwind instruments, I press buttons for eight hours at work and Im studying to be a gynecologist... I guarantee I can make you squirt, babe.
Captain America stopped by our tailgate. He ate a taco.
What's clit gel and why is it in my wallet.
Um, It's tempting but I'm not into coke or farmers.
I wish there was a tumbleweed emoji. Because that would describe my vagina.
She's asleep in a fisher-price toy car
MY TITS JUST CAUSED A CAR ACCIDENT ON THE HIGHWAY! i kid you not!! i thinl the giy is actually dead
They have a shelf full of jello shots, what have i gotten myself into
Randomize
