And then I said "flip over. I want to show you something i learned in Afghanistan."
What do you say about some mid-afternoon anal?
Giving the kids Children's Claritin and calling it candy.....Is it setting them up for drug abuse later?
just drunkenly made mashed potatoes at midnight. what have you done for your calorie intake lately?
One thing noone tells you about getting put in the drunk tank is do it barefoot. You get free flipflops.
First of all, I don't like eggnog. Second of all too much rum is all bad. And thirdly I'm not there to sit in your lap and pretend you are Santa and I've been a bad girl.
I'm not sure how many more innuendos I can slip into this fucking conversation before I just blatantly say "I want to fuck you."
I took my exam the next day still drunk and failed, but I kno for a fact that I filled in the bubbles for my name perfectly
The walk home lasted longer than the sex. He lives in the flat above the bar.
After getting kicked out of the bar, you proceeded to McDonald's, ordered 30 nuggets, slammed them all back in 5 minutes and then stole 3 traffic cones...how you only got charged with drunk in public is beyond me.
She's got Mike in the bathroom. He's covered in meat.
Happy birthday and sorry I punched your friend in the face
My vagina needs a break, I had to ice it with a beer bottle last night.
You just missed an honest to god bukkake
she compared me favorably to her vibrator
which one?
Randomize
