Raise your hand if you bought 2 annoying girls shots of water. CLOWNS.
everything was goin great until he pulled out his ed hardy lighter and smoked in my face like he was cool.
it's like you attract all the douchebags that nobody wants. people should thank you.
they just did a mariachi cover of free bird
I need Christmas break to be over. I'm tired of fucking my old High School girlfriends
Totally just asked Dad if I needed to show the real estate guy my tits so he would let us buy the house. I've really got to work on that filtering thing.
Just found my toeprints on the glass of his sunroof.
Thanks to her sunglasses tan, I can't look at her when she blows me cause it's like getting blown by a raccoon. A very talented raccoon
I think 2012 will be the year I purposely put myself in awkward situations. Much like 2011 but really trying this time. Like fucking the little sister of a girl I already fucked and dating a chick that lives with her ex. It could be awesome or horrible.
Do not shit in our house. There is no TP. I am walking to get more, if I do not return, I have probably died of dysentery after my last wagon wheel got stuck in a gulch. Tell Martha and Lou Ann that I love them, and that I passed away doing the Lord's work.
You FaceTimed me to show me he was sucking your tit
…wtf were in those pills mom gave me
Oh goddamn. That a super downer Tuesday reality right there. Just hit me with the cold, hard, nasty facts.
You can't die you're my only democrat family member
Looks like taco salad for lunch. I may have died and gone to be better circle in hell than I thought.
I am high. And my mom surpised me today. Now i am high and with my mom....bad idea
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