We decided to smoke and then made crosses on our foreheads for ash wednesday
mom would be proud
They were greeting people getting off the 48 with green beers and cheers. The one day I decide not to take the bus home...
I figured out why I insisted on leaving my sweater on the ground outside. I smelled it and I'm 97% sure I peed on it last night
This guy needs to come out; I can feel him sucking my dick from across the room.
Either I'm tripping balls or my dog has super powers.
You need to come back and help me drink our beer so the fridge has room for the other beers
Are there any rules against fucking the hot TA?
Maybe for her....
Her problem, not mine
After we had sex he told me it was a "goodbye gift". We haven't talked since.
is it wrong to hook up with someone at a memorial drum circle
I see you listening to my get shitfaced playlist on spotify. glad we're on the same page tonight there's a drink waiting for you downstairs.
just the thought of you slurpin down noodles really rustles my jimmy
you suck at sexting
All I need to do is acquire a Shrek costume.
Please don't traumatize your girlfriend too terribly. Have fun.
fyi my negative pregnancy test is taped to the fridge...i'll take it over an A+ any day. be proud.
So you can now add nose to my list of places that cum has gone that it shouldn't...
I gave him one of my famous hand jobs.
Randomize
