You flung your panties at that guy you liked with an accuracy that I have never seen before.
Learn some fucking English or leave me alone! "Your" is for something that belongs to you, like 'your herpes'. And "you're" is a contraction for "you are", like "you're not sleeping with me".
i dont care that its taken 20 hrs to pee without hurting, BEST HATE SEX EVER.
My fucking roommate unpluged my alarm; I pissed on his clean clothes.
Working on an important paper into the wee hours of the morning, and every time I type the word "situation," I can't help but think of effing Jersey Shore. Those guidos are now ruining my academic life.
The beer is more important than you right now.
Not enough clothes on. Not enough vagina. Not enough drugs in my body.
Are you asking me on a date where we get shithoused and do some fingerpainting?
He kissed my hand AND my forehead. I don't think this virginity business is for heartless whores like us.
I learned so much about myself in that shower.
Hi this is the guy from the cell phone store. Your Dad just upgraded your phone as a surprise. I didn't tell him about your topless pics on your phone. I transfered them to new phone. Nice rack!
Can you stop being a bitch and just take some Kaluha shots with me bro?!?
Kind of like the new iOS 10 because I can send sexts with fireworks or confetti. Really gets the point across
WHY CANT I FIND JUST A NORMAL DISNEY LOVING MAN TO PAINT WITH ALL THE COLORS OF THE WIND WITH!!
Come on in and take your pants off
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