i want to fuck
?
it's pretty self explanatory
Scratch that. Lia's boy toy's brother has a gorilla costume. This is gonna be great.
The chance that I have herpes may have made me find god
just spent about 3 1/2 hours looking for a dollar so I can buy weed.
suggestion: become a stripper.
I got my period while he was fingering me , I knew it because I never get that wet.
Did u at least say sorry?
I am literally too baked to press the call button. How am I supposed to bone him?
you're surprised the chick that fucked you for a free cup has herpes. i don't feel bad for you.
okay. so this hammed chick got arrested and she keeps trying to make out with the cop. i like her style.
I feel like I just rode a horse, did a million jumping jacks, ran a marathon and need a carton on cigarettes. best sex hands down... EVER
You know what, don't even answer. Just promise me you'll go to the Corner of Shame when you get home.
I think Facebook knows you fucked me. All of a sudden I get everything you do in my news feed.
Stop acting like the Lucky Charms you're feeding people is actually ecstasy.
How is it??
I'm drinking Gatorade out of a champagne flute.
Things could not have gone more poorly if I had stripped naked and run through the Sahara with sirloins tied to my vagina.
I don't know why, but whenever I shave my balls I feel more aerodynamic.
Randomize
