I bought a boat. Want to have sex on The Angry Clam? That's what I named it.
Shes cool when Im fuckin smashed.....Sober.....She suuuuuuuuuuucks
this is the second time this summer that a girl has called me a ken dol
you shouldn't let them see you without your pants on
I have two girls sleeping in my bed naked and I ended up making it to class, what were you saying about staying in on the weekdays?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You would only drink if the space jam soundtrack was playing, you thought it was hilarious that before every shot you said "y'all ready for this".
i want to cheat with him just to show his girlfriend what a terrible person he is.
I just made SCOTCHSICLES. no further info is necessary
It's a never ending cycle of men I've fucked knowing other men I've fucked. I need a new town.
WTF? Why is there a pic of my tits in ur dad's office?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Totally on the hot mess express last night. Mom said I was passed out on her kitchen floor. Told her I was drinking genuine tea.
He somehow always manages to get me naked within 5 minutes of being together. It's like fucking witchcraft.
Like I didn't gracefully walk into these feelings. No, I fucking stumbled and fell face fucking first.
so hungover. idk whos house or comp im on
I am witnessing a blind guy whip ass at beer pong
I had a good weekend too...although I cried about the dog in a drunken stupor last night...not one of my finest moments, but it's all water under the bridge.
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